I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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