I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I have tasted many bathrooms
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
