Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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