butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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