I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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