dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
