If i could tip my vagina, i would.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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