you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
