tonight lets celebrate not being married
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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