I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
