Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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