Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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