You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
