how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Randomize