im having a threesome with these popsicles
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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