I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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