Please, let me fuck your mom
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
