she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize