do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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