i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
