you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
