69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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