allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
