this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
