i just google imaged poop.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
