fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
