Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize