The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
