At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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