it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
40s are totally the cure
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
