i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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