Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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