what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
