you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
