I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
