I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
