it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
