were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize