Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
