well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
