We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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