There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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