He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
