Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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