On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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