Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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