My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
