return my video game
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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