how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize