you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
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