She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize