yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
