just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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